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A Hairy Posse

Posted: 01 Jul 2011, 12:14
by Dougie
So here’s the thing. I ride with group of chaps that are more lunch than bunch. We wear lycra not so much to fit in, but to keep things from falling out. To us a peloton is a unit of measure, the weight of lycra caught between the rolls on the lower abdomen, rather than a collective noun for elite athletes. We are a “posse” and a hairy one at that.

Not being one for the man scaping rituals of so many of the males of my species, I seek some advice, the collective wisdom as it were. The shave. To shave one’s legs or to resist. I have read the many and varied reasons for the act. I hear oft quoted “it makes it easier to massage” or “it’s easier if injured” or “I look better in heels”.

I have this to say in response to these fine comments. Firstly, I don’t get a massage all that often. In fact the last time I was even close to having one was a couple of decades ago in Patpong Road a few days after my 20th Birthday. After being told of committed and undying love, or at least that was what I understood “love you long time” meant in Thai, by what turned out to be a very attractive man (it was all very confusing and somewhat embarrassing and really a story for another day). Secondly, the first and I hope only, serious fall I have had, involved me landing on my head, smashing my helmet and getting a permanent “badge of honour” on my elbow. My legs were remarkably unscathed in the whole falling off, bitumen contact thing. As to looking better in heels, I found out only recently that was more applicable to the ladies……

So before I unleash the Gillette on my furry I would be keen to get some thoughts.

Cheers

Dougie

A Hairy Posse

Posted: 01 Jul 2011, 14:13
by timyone
Lol! For me it's about falls firstly, it's hard to stick things on hair, and secondly fashion, though my legs actually look better with hair! Less white! But I feel out in a grade :p

I've come off three times this year after some one fell in front of me and have lost a heap of skin on my legs :s

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 01 Jul 2011, 16:25
by Rainbow
what a great read, I would like to here your lady-boy stories too, hehe.
Don't do it! I often hear people saying that they will be faster with smooth legs etc. but seriously, women (I understand I may be speaking for myself here!) prefer the masculinity attached with leg hair. Would you do it for one event in particular? And once you start shaving, where do you stop?

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 01 Jul 2011, 16:28
by orphic
Go the hairy legs. I much prefer riding behind mountain bikers with hairy legs than roadies with smooth legs. And when you overtake a smooth legged roadie with your hairy legs, you can feel so much more proud!

A Hairy Posse

Posted: 01 Jul 2011, 16:59
by timyone
So you respect the roadies more? Bigger achievement to go past?

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 01 Jul 2011, 18:44
by orphic
Nah I respect both equally, but am sure some roadies might get annoyed getting passed by hairy legs (no one from this club though!)

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 02 Jul 2011, 09:28
by Lizanne
i have to say a little bit of man scaping is good.
if you'r a guy you probabally own an electric har clipper. put i down to a low setting and trim the bushy leg hair. that way it's easier to put sunscreen on, bandaids stick better, and you don't look like a yetti. but you still have hair to protect the dignity.

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 02 Jul 2011, 10:08
by Trouty
Dougie - that is an awesome read, hopefully I get to hear about instalment 2 re the lady man when we see you at the Tour Down Under.

I guess if you do "alot" of riding & racing, the risk of falling is greater so it's not nice to have bits of road, rock & hair stuck to your injuries when you are trying to heal. Alternatively the more riding you do the more, the more you're body screams for a massage (not the Thai style "love muscle" massage so to speak). So I guess the question for the boys is - how much riding is a lot of riding? More than 12 hours a week? Serious riders seem to have smooth legs - and they are usually the bunch of riders that ride past DHBC at Waterfall and comment about how hairy our bunch is - yes true I've heard them. I doubt it adds to wind resistance and or performance. So if you ride with a group that is more lunch than bunch....I'd suggest leave your manly hair on your pins otherwise it's just annoying having to shave them every day like most of us woman have to. However, if you said you had a heap of back, chest and shoulder hair - I'd say - go the wax!!

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 02 Jul 2011, 12:11
by jermxx
For what it's worth, I found shaving the legs less hassle than shaving the face. The tricky question is always where you stop though...

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 02 Jul 2011, 12:24
by Adrian E
I'm quite happy pulling out the clippers and razor blade every few months, but its certainly not a weekly/monthly ritual.

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 07 Jul 2011, 19:21
by Richard
If you are only half serious then how about a compromise. Just shave one leg!

If you like it then shave the other, otherwise just leave it that way and it will be a great source of post ride cafe conversation

The beauty of hair - it grows back.

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 07 Jul 2011, 21:27
by Dougie
I thank you all from the heart of my bottom for the sage and wise advice on this aerodynamically charged topic. Clearly I have been channeling Richard this afternoon when i made an enquiry at the Bride's salon, the House of Pain Balmain. I spoke to the delightful Cruella and discussed my options.

I could have a half leg, full leg or the ahemm, Manzillian. Now since i was really after just the "Cassette and Cracks" rather than the full "Groupset", i figured the Manzillian was best left for Mardi Gras attendees and Olympic Swimmers (or both?). She provided me prices and a terrifying description that made we want to be a little bit sick.

But back to channeling Richard. I am cheap (also easy) and I look for a deal, often where one doesn't exist. my enquiries revolved around two options. The Half Leg Wax. Firstly, could you wax just the leading edges, the fronts only. it seemed logical to me. The hair on the backs of my legs weren't causing me a problem. She hadn't considered this option before (i can't imagine why not). She felt she might need some guidance from her Boss on that one. Sensing a problem here i went for option two. (you ready Richard?) How about one full leg only, the left one and leave the right one in all it's hirsute glory. As Waterfall is vaguely clockwise the added drag would pull me somewhat to the right making the whole thing far more efficient. she told me that this was all a bit wrong and i needed to consider what i really wanted then call her back.

Oh well back to the drawing board.

cheers

Dougie

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 07 Jul 2011, 21:37
by timyone
theres a place in newtown thats heaps cheap, I cant remember the name, but I went there on a date with a girl, we both got waxed

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 08 Jul 2011, 05:57
by Trouty
theres a place in newtown thats heaps cheap, I cant remember the name, but I went there on a date with a girl, we both got waxed
Sounds romantic Timmy

Re: A Hairy Posse

Posted: 08 Jul 2011, 07:48
by Stuart
Dougie, mate. Really, seriously, think about this. Just how often do you crash? Do you really want to look like your night job is as a Trannie? Leave the leg waxing to the poor women who must endure it and those who ride all the time, for a job no less, or maybe just all the time. Nothing would get me to shave my legs (well almost nothing - I am open to large cash bribes), shaving my face is enough. As for a Manzillian ... really, just say no as evolution has decided we should have pubes and hair on our legs.

And OK - when are we seeing you on a Waterfall ride then?