The rules - Sydney style

Bicycle related chatter & discussion
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mikesbytes
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Postby mikesbytes » 28 Jul 2012, 11:15

We are all familiar with but what are the 'local rules'

Just a piece of fun, please add/change/delete as you feel fit

- It is mandatory to go to the coffee shop after a training ride
- If you are riding a drop bar bike, it must be carried down the stairs at the northern end of Sydney Harbour Bridge (SHB), unless you rode down them, which I don't recommend
- Racing riders riding fixies must use a fixed gear, single speed is not permitted
- Racing riders must not permit any rider on time trail bikes or road bikes with clip-ons to overtake them, unless the rider can be identified as another racing rider
- If you are climbing a hill on your bike commute and you spot another commuter wearing a pokadot jersey, you must overtake that rider
- SPD's are never to be used on a velodrome, crit or road race
Last edited by mikesbytes on 28 Jul 2012, 21:52, edited 1 time in total.

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Philip
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Postby Philip » 28 Jul 2012, 21:11

I have been known to follow polka dot jerseys for miles, heading well off course if necessary, just to wait for a hill on which to pass the said polka dot jersey. ;)

Now please excuse my ignorance. If SPD's aren't permissible what are permissible? And what's the difference anyway? told you I was ignorant.
Ignorant and contrarian, I spent good money on my riding glasses just to break rule #36.
http://www.velominati.com/the-rules/#36

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mikesbytes
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Postby mikesbytes » 28 Jul 2012, 21:58

Velominati are stricter on SPD's than the Sydney rules

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Dougie
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Postby Dougie » 29 Jul 2012, 19:51

Rule 8 – Topics of Conversation during rides must be limited to cycling specific topics, or the weather.
Rule 9 – Topics of conversation at the Café must be limited to cycling specific topics, or the weather
Rule 10 – The ONLY weather to be discussed during a ride or at the Café is the weather you are currently experiencing or weather as predicted by the BOM.gov.au. No other weather matters.
Rule 11 – Cycling specific conversation must be liberally littered with cycling terminology, jargon and slang. If you cannot speak the language, talk slower and shout.
Rule 12 – Regardless of one’s actual performance on the ride when returning home the conversation with your loved one MUST be as such. “Hi (insert pet name) I rode like a tiger today”.
Rule 13 – Everything about your Cycling Club is superior to all other Cycling Clubs full stop.
Rule 14 – When travelling overseas you may sport a “GreenEDGE” jersery. Provided said GreenEDGE jersey is pure and free from other major sponsor’s logos.
Rule 15 – All your Children must show an interest in cycling and should be able to provide data on at least ten riders from the pro peloton.
Rule 16 – When a fellow rider obtains a new piece of kit or equipment the appropriate interest and appreciation must be shown.
Rule 17 – Non cyclists will never, ever understand.
Rule 18 – The only magazine subscriptions you are permitted to have are for cycling.
Rule 19 – All cycling magazines are porn
Rule 20 – Not all porn is bad. See Rule 19
Rule 21 – When non cyclists show disinterest in your weekend’s riding. They are only fooling with you, they really wish to hear everything in minute detail, twice.
Rule 22 – Torn or damaged jerseys are encouraged if you tore or damaged them in a crash.
Rule 23 – Never discuss a crash. Your torn or damaged jersey is a sufficient statement.

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mikesbytes
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Postby mikesbytes » 30 Jul 2012, 22:23

LOL Dougie

Rule 24 - Never bump a red light when wearing club uniform

timyone
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Postby timyone » 08 Aug 2012, 10:50

Riding down that steep bit on the harbor bridge is a bit freaky, I once did it with a lass I was following, she wouldn't have let me get over it if I hadn't followed!

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mikesbytes
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Postby mikesbytes » 08 Aug 2012, 11:13

I use to ride down it, but I quit in 2004. Saw several accidents over 4 years

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Karzie
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Postby Karzie » 08 Aug 2012, 12:50

I used to ride down it. Till one day when I didn't get my weight back far enough and I cartwheeled. Caused a few surprised looks as I went passed...

timyone
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Postby timyone » 08 Aug 2012, 22:05

lol wow!!!

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Toff
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Postby Toff » 16 Aug 2012, 00:05

I'm not a Velominati follower. Instead, I adhere to rules.

In relation to DHBC rules though, here are my additions, which actually run contrary to what you may have read on other rule lists...

Rule 25 – Après ride, it is necessary to remove helmet and immediately cover the naked head with a cyling cap. If no cycling cap is within easy reach, a Pantani style bandanna is an acceptable substitute. If it is Winter, a beanie will also be considered an acceptable substitute. Bonus points for team issue equipment, especially if it matches your kit. Double bonus points for wearing a cycling toque instead of a beanie. The wearing of cycling caps, toques and bandanas is encouraged, both on and off the bike, and even when out of lycra. It is important to let others know you are a cyclist, even if just popping down to the shops for a six-pack, a pie and a pack of smokes*.

Rule 26 – Wearing your cycling-specific glasses is encouraged both on and off the bike. Off the bike, when overcast, they may be pushed up onto the forehead, and rested behind the brim of your cycling cap. Double points for wearing your clear lensed velodrome glasses indoors, just to let others know they are dealing with a cycling-specific athlete of awesome proportions.

* Yep. I said smokes. Click .

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Eleri
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Postby Eleri » 16 Aug 2012, 06:02

Where's your parrot then? and does it speak fluent Italian?

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Toff
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Postby Toff » 16 Aug 2012, 08:36

Parrot? Baaaah. I'm exploiting a loophole on that one: I now ride in Puma cycling shoes. Haha.

rhys
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Postby rhys » 16 Aug 2012, 10:38

It is the responsibility of each cyclist to be a local at no less than three coffee shops and two pubs.
Only pubs which allow indoor parking of bicycles and have coopers on tap are permitted.

rhys
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Postby rhys » 16 Aug 2012, 10:42

A cyclist's prowess shall be judged solely on the number and cost of bicycles owned. This importance increases exponentially the further east one travels.

The longer you've been cycling, the better things used to be.

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mikesbytes
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Postby mikesbytes » 29 Aug 2012, 08:19

Rule24 - no undies under nicks

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weiyun
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Postby weiyun » 29 Aug 2012, 11:06

When rules go beyond 25, there will be no more rules. Free for all!

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mikesbytes
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Postby mikesbytes » 29 Aug 2012, 11:47

Is that a rule?

Richard
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Postby Richard » 29 Aug 2012, 20:01

No just a technical guideline accompanying the regulation that pertains to the rule

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Toff
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Postby Toff » 29 Aug 2012, 22:40


Richard
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Postby Richard » 31 Aug 2012, 08:01

More like a pre-election promise

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Toff
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Postby Toff » 31 Aug 2012, 08:59

A core promise, or a non-core promise?

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jbcow
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Postby jbcow » 10 Sep 2012, 15:01

No one has mentioned the quintessential Sydney rule: Scream and yell abuse at any car or ped who does anything you may not like. The intensity of your hatred should not in any way be moderated by actual events. Whether they nearly killed you or just caught your attention from afar should not change your attitude.

Not really my favourite rule, but one I see followed by seasoned cyclists and and newbies alike.


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